5 Things to Remember When You Feel Like a Failure

Feeling like a failure is something that just about every single person experiences at some point in their lives. Failure can cause some people to give up on their dreams and retreat into themselves. Others may use the failure, or perceived failure, as inspiration to build determination to succeed. For some people it may be a temporary feeling, whereas for others it’s something more long-term. Either way, if you happen to feel that you are a failure regarding one specific thing, in one area of life or in general, here are five things to remember that will help you feel a bit better.

• You are not beyond help. If you have experienced what you feel is a series of failures, it may be that you begin to feel both hopeless and helpless. You may feel that your life sucks and there is nothing that could change that. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth. We all have knockbacks. We all feel like a failure at times. However, we are the only ones who have the power to change the narrative that we’re beyond help. The first positive step to take is to help yourself. Draw a line under the failure, tell yourself that you have learnt from it and therefore cannot allow it to happen again. A change in mindset will bring a change in outcome.

• You are not the only person who feels like this. There will be many other people, including some that you know, who feel like a failure and struggle to achieve what they perceive as success. It may be that some people have achieved something fantastic but still feel like a failure due to imposter syndrome (where a person feels they haven’t earned their success or doesn’t deserve to be in the role they have). Either way, reminding yourself that other people are feeling exactly the same as you can serve as a pick me up and enable you to move on from you feel is a failure.

• You don’t know what other people’s lives are like or what they are going through. Just because other people appear successful, it doesn’t mean that they feel it or that they are happy. They could be just as miserable as you are feeling right now. Happiness doesn’t tend to come from something we have achieved or have in our lives. It’s a state of being that only we have control over. Success does not equate to happiness. Success does not equate to feeling successful. There may be some people you know that appear to have it all but actually feel more of a failure than you do for some reason. It’s east to accept things at face value, but quite often if you dig a little deeper you find that all is not what it seems. Which leads me to the next point…

• Social media is not real life. Websites such as Facebook and Twitter are full of people boasting about how great their life is. People on Twitter may have a list of impressive titles and credentials in their bio. People on Facebook may post pictures of their amazing holiday or something else fantastic that’s happening which makes everyone think that person is living their best life. However, what people post on social media is an edited version of their life. It’s not reflective of the whole picture. As with the previous point, if you delve beneath the surface you will probably find that their life is not as amazing as people on social media are led to believe. Social media envy is very common these days, with people looking at what others are posting and feeling like a failure because they don’t appear to have achieved the same level of success as them. It could be that the person posting on social media appears to have a better job, a better home life, and lots of material things that have made them happy. This doesn’t mean that you are a failure. It’s important to be thankful for what you do have, be pleased with the successes you have achieved, and take social media with a pinch of salt. We are all capable of creating a perfect image that doesn’t reflect reality, so let go of any social media envy you have.

• Bouncing back from failure depends on the way you think. As you may have picked up from all of the previous points, mindset plays a clear part in moving on from a failure, or what you perceive to be a failure. It’s easy to get bogged down in feelings of failure, but you have it within you to turn a setback into a comeback. Maybe something didn’t work out the way you wanted it to. However, you’re still ok. Yes, failing feels uncomfortable, but you are able to handle that. Failure may have knocked your confidence, but ultimately it will make you stronger. These are all positive things to tell yourself that will boost your mindset and enable you to bounce back better than ever.